There’s a particular kind of disrespect that doesn’t shout.
It doesn’t argue. It doesn’t insult you to your face. It doesn’t even tell you “no.”
It just… disappears.
And if you’ve been in business long enough—especially in Jamaica—you’ll know that kind of disrespect can cut deeper than a man cussing you outright.
Because at least then, you know where you stand.
This one started how most “good” opportunities start.
A referral.
That alone already tilts the scale. In real estate, referrals are not casual. A man doesn’t pass your name unless you’ve already proven something—delivery, reliability, results. So when you’re introduced, you’re not walking in cold. You’re walking in with borrowed trust.
So I went.
We looked at the development. Apartment blocks coming up. Structure there. Activity there. Movement there. The kind of thing that tells you: “Yes, this is real. This is happening.”
The man himself? Late.
An hour late.
Now, if you’ve lived long enough, you know—first impressions don’t lie. We just choose to ignore them when the opportunity looks good enough.
He turns up. We talk. His right-hand man is there. Phones ringing. Calls being answered mid-conversation. Attention drifting. But still… there’s something about the setup that keeps you engaged.
You stay.
Because in this business, you learn to tolerate a certain level of chaos. Developers are rarely calm, polished, structured individuals. They’re often juggling ten fires at once. So you tell yourself: this is normal.
Then come the drinks.
Then comes the handshake.
Not a casual one either. Firm grip. Eye contact. That look men give each other when they’re trying to signal seriousness. Agreement.
You leave that meeting thinking: this is done.
But business isn’t made in moments. It’s revealed in patterns.
And the pattern here was wrong from the start.
Calls unanswered.
Meetings rearranged… then rearranged again.
You call once—no answer. Twice—no answer. Three times—you start questioning yourself. By the fifth call, you’re no longer dealing with a busy man. You’re dealing with avoidance.
And yet, every now and then, he reappears.
Another meeting. Another conversation. Another handshake.
Another moment that feels like progress.
But nothing moves.
No full details. No proper documentation. Gaps everywhere. Just enough engagement to keep you there—but never enough to actually get the deal across the line.
And this is where many realtors get trapped.
Not because they’re foolish.
But because they’re hopeful.
Let’s be honest about something most people won’t say out loud.
In Jamaica, we place a heavy value on “the man.”
Not just the deal—the man.
How he carries himself. What he drives. Who he knows. The confidence. The presence.
Two 60-grand vehicles outside? That speaks.
The tone of voice? That speaks.
The way he looks you in the eye? That speaks.
But here’s the uncomfortable truth:
Some men have mastered the appearance of credibility without ever developing the discipline that sustains it.
And if you’re not careful, you’ll mistake one for the other.
Months pass.
You’ve invested time. Energy. Thought. Effort.
And then… nothing.
No replies.
No returned calls.
No acknowledgement.
It reaches the point where you start asking yourself: Is this man even alive?
And then you hear—through others—that he is.
Alive. Active. Moving around.
Just not responding to you.
Now let’s deal with the real question.
What kind of person does that?
Not in a theoretical sense. In a real, grounded, Jamaican sense.
Because we know people.
We read people.
We’ve dealt with people from uptown, downtown, corporate, street, church, government—every layer.
And this behaviour stands out.
This is not just “busy.”
This is not just “disorganised.”
This is not just “things came up.”
This is a man who, at some level, does not respect process, and by extension, does not respect your time.
And respect in business is not a feeling—it’s a behaviour.
You either return the call or you don’t.
You either follow through or you don’t.
Everything else is noise.
There’s also something else here—something more subtle.
You mentioned agitation.
That matters.
Because sometimes, what looks like confidence is actually pressure.
A man juggling too much.
A man overextended.
A man managing things that are not as solid as they appear.
And when pressure builds, one of the first things to collapse is communication.
Not because the man is evil.
But because he is avoiding reality.
Avoiding decisions.
Avoiding conversations he doesn’t want to have.
So instead of saying, “This isn’t going to work,” he disappears.
And leaves you holding the silence.
But let’s not let him carry all the weight here.
There’s a lesson on the other side of this as well.
Because experience is not just about what others do to you—it’s about what you allow to continue.
At some point, the signs were clear.
The lateness.
The missed calls.
The inconsistency.
The lack of follow-through.
And yet, you stayed in the process.
Not out of weakness—but out of professionalism.
Out of the belief that if you just hold steady, it will come together.
That’s a good trait.
But in this business, it needs boundaries.
As Dean Jones, founder of Jamaica Homes, puts it:
“Real estate will test your patience—but it will punish you if you don’t protect your time.”
And that’s the pivot.
Because this situation was never really about the handshake.
It was about what happened after the handshake.
A handshake is easy.
It costs nothing.
No paperwork. No commitment. No accountability.
Just two men, a moment, and a signal.
But business is not built on signals.
It’s built on structure.
Documentation.
Clarity.
Execution.
Without those, a handshake is just theatre.
And some men are very good performers.
So how do you overcome something like this?
Not emotionally—but professionally.
You tighten your process.
You stop being impressed by presence and start measuring behaviour.
You reduce the number of chances you give to inconsistency.
You recognise that a man who cannot manage communication cannot manage a transaction.
And most importantly—you learn to walk away earlier.
Not angrily.
Not dramatically.
Just quietly.
Because silence, when understood properly, is an answer.
There’s a saying we don’t always say out loud, but we all know:
“Every man know himself.”
And that applies here.
Because deep down, he knows what he did.
He knows the agreements made.
He knows the time invested.
He knows the calls unanswered.
And whether he acknowledges it or not, that behaviour defines him far more than any car parked outside his gate.
And you?
You walk away with something far more valuable than that listing ever would have been.
Clarity.
Sharper instincts.
Stronger boundaries.
Because in real estate—and in life—you’re not just building deals.
You’re building judgment.
And once that sharpens, you stop chasing opportunities.
You start selecting them.
Or as Dean Jones says:
“In this business, not every deal is a loss when it falls through—some are wins in disguise.”
And this one?
This one was a lesson dressed up as an opportunity.
The kind you only need to learn once.